For the first time in my life, I am about to venture into a sphere of blogging I have hitherto avoided at all costs. Recent experience, however, has enlightened me to my civic duty to all of you. So I leave the comfort of my usual useless rambling to give you my first ever beauty blog.
Is it Loud in Here?
How to Turn up the Volume, Hair Edition
Many companies would have you believe that their product is the only combination of chemicals that can give you the voluminous type of hair previously seen only on muppets. I'm here to give you an alternative, based on personal experience. it's tried and true!
STATIC
While exasperatingly trying to dampen and control my static charged hair, which clung to my face and neck like the many tentacles of an ocean dwelling creature, a small and peppy girl chimed in from the sink next to mine.
"Wow, you have beautiful hair!"
I looked at her, peering through the blockade of split ends which had created a cloud of dead cells around my head and obstructed my view.
"...really? I was just trying to get it to stop standing straight up."
"No way, it has such great volume."
My voice, now muffled and masked by the matted hair clinging to my mouth, responded with a confused expression of gratitude. And from that experience, an idea was born and a generation of lifeless hair was given hope. The answer to our problems: state electricity.
Yep, this natural and free electricity will take your hair to the next level, making even Edison admire with envy. So forget the conditioners and the thickening sprays. Leave behind the mousse, the Argan Oil, and expensive shampoos. Instead, find your nearest balloon, trampoline, or fleece jacket, and rub it over your head.
Because why have hair like this?
When you could have hair like this?
Your choice is obvious. And you are welcome.
peace and fashion
rrw
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