confessions of...me.

You know those moments when you realize something about yourself that you really wish you hadn't realized because living in denial is better than accepting them? ...take a moment and go read that again. I mean, I have this mental image of who I am and I'm not going to lie, I'm pretty dang sophisticated, funny, and charismatic in my head. And then I realize who I actually am and my mental-me just goes "Ah Rach.....really?" Well, this week the real me had to respond to mental-me with an ashamed "Yeah. Really." Here are a few of those things that caused me to wonder at myself.

*I like Katy Perry. I do. I've resisted so hard for so long but honestly, I just can't help letting my inner lioness sing along when I hear "Roar" on the radio. And there's no way to not love "Unconditionally," especially when your dad suddenly makes it a song about your favorite type of hair product.

*I'm that person in the movie theater that laughs. Out loud. And gets the over the shoulder look from the people in front of her. I don't know when this started happening, but it just did. I swear it was just yesterday that I was a moody teenager who never wanted anyone to know she had emotions. Besides moody of course.

*I'm done being single. gasp. I know, I know. I had that whole "#singleforlife" hashtag thing going and it's kind of a taboo thing for someone to actually admit. Maybe it's just all of the Hallmark Channel movies about people being reunited with that person they've always loved during the most romantic time of the year. Or all the twinkle lights. I swear. Twinkle lights were invented to make you want to cuddle. I hate them. But I love them. Oh so much.

Anyway, what was I saying before I made twinkle lights my arch nemesis? Oh yeah. Taking a break from singlehood. Thus...

*I'm on Tinder. YOU GUYS. I'm on Tinder. I don't even know what to think about myself right now. And in all reality, I'm terrible at it. It is so stressful and I can't ever swipe either way without messaging my best friend (who got me into it in the first place) asking what the social protocol is. But dang, it's pretty fun. This is also my public apology for calling it "morally repugnant." My words can't get down my throat fast enough.

*I fought really hard at a white elephant gift exchange for this.

And then took way too many self timer pictures with it. These are 4 of...more than 4.

ps. to my future roommates. Is it ok if he moves in with me? He could be our mascot. Or protector. Or friend. I mean, once you see his chest you will understand. Promise. Ok. Thanks.

Yeah, that whole "let's not be single anymore" thing is just going to take off. I know it.

Well, I'm done voluntarily humiliating myself. How many times did you wince for me? Or blush and wish it were over? Probably not more than my mental-me. She's wondering why the heck I even put this post together. Dang it, I can't be as classy as you, ok!

And now I'm talking to myself. 

22 is going to be a good year.

Oh, and I also realized that I cannot wear tights without getting holes/runs in them. #stayclassyfolks

peace and birthday banners

no my birthday related posts will never end.

rrw

happy birthday harry

Today is a wonderful day. In order to celebrate, drink some butterbeer or pumpkin juice, eat a bag or two of Bertie Botts Every Flavor Bean, and honor The Boy Who Lived.

How well do you know Harry?

1. What is the name of Neville's toad?
2. Without looking, can you recite the first sentence of the first book?
3. What is the name of the goblin who helped Harry in the first and last book?
4. What is the core of Harry's wand?
5. What is the name of the Weasley's owl?
6. Who was Harry's first captain while on the Gryffindor quidditch team?
7. What are the seven horcruxes? (bonus if you say the "8th")
8. What are screaming plants are called?
9. Which Deathly Hallow did Hermione, Ron, and Harry each say would be the best to have?
10. What is the name of Mr. Crouch's house elf?
11. The Defense Against the Dark Arts teaching position is thought to be cursed. Name all the teachers who occupied the position through the Harry Potter series.
12. What is Snape's patronus? Hermione's?
13. What are the nicknames used by the Marauders?
14. Who wrote Hogwarts: A History?
15. What did Harry use to be able to swim underwater during the Triwizard Tournament?
16. What is the cure to the dementor's influence?
17. How did Harry, Ron, and Hermione become friends?
18. What is the title of Gilderoy Lockhart's autobiography?
19. Where was Harry borne?
20. How many times have you read the books?

peace and potter

rrw

sometimes i'm social

Last night me and my bangs went to a surprise birthday party for a set of twins that have changed my life. One, the dearest, kindest, most hilarious, strongest, smartest, most beautiful, clever, caring, adventurous girl in my life whoa. that's a lot of adjectives. but they're true. i mean...she survived thursday night 80s dancing. give that girl a birthday cake. oh wait...and the other my destined and dashing partner in that most glorious of relationships known as marriage. The party was a hit, with beautiful people, smiles, chocolate cake, pictures, pink lemonade, and leftover Christmas decorations.

Erm. Excuse me. I mean "winter" decorations.

As my previous post can attest, I'm obviously feeling hyper aware of my hair. I tried my best to prep it beforehand so that it would have that "I don't care what my hair does but doesn't it look great?" look that all the Grey's Anatomy girls have going on. That, or at least keep it off my face without it being so slicked back that I would be mistaken as Draco Malfoy. In the end neither attempt would have worked due to the temperature in the apartment. Get 20+ college students in a little apartment, most wearing sweaters or jackets, all trying to impress their crush of the night while a disco ball flashes from the kitchen, and you have the perfect environment for deflated hair. That, and deodorant testing. good news. i think we all passed.

In short, I felt obligated to apologize for my deflated bangs every 10 minutes. I imagine it's what having an annoying-drunk friend come with you somewhere is like. Constantly having to say things like, "I'm so sorry. I don't know why they're doing that," or "You know, they usually behave better," or "Please don't look at them." But instead of trying to hide behind my phone or blend into the Christmas tree ..."winter" tree... as I expected to do, I surprised myself and reacted totally contrary to prior plans. no seriously. i already had nicholas hoult's twitter feed loaded on my phone...just in case, you know?

Anyway, I ended up being more social than is probably socially acceptable. First I was chatting about a broken pinky, then the prayer position, then how French and Spanish were kind of the same, then about how I'm not going to law school, then about "if my life was a movie," then about Brazilian men and accounting men, whether mountains make you feel claustrophobic or not, then about how to get phone numbers, then about waterboards, the trees in Minnesota, how people in Minnesota say "Minnesota",  whether tacos or burgers are better, if there are places to ski in Ukraine, and Elder Oaks. I mean, we are at BYU. I was bouncing around that room like no ones business and loving on the cookies made by the cutest elementary school teacher. These cookies...if you could take your favorite song, the most attractive man you can think of, a snuggie, a baby panda, and that short movie Paperman and put them in a cookie? It would taste like these cookies.yeah

what's the point of this post?

In conclusion, I guess I hope people remember me as the crazy girl who said "Minnesota" 17 times in a row rather than the one who had a mop on her forehead.

When I came home I celebrated my antics by putting stretchy pants on and getting my hair as far away from my face as possible.

it's called a topknot. 

and...is literally a knot.

#superfuntobrushout

peace and selfies
i promise it's just a phase i'm going through?
rrw

and i was all like...

a week ago i was all like

now i'm just like

yeah.

especially that sparkly leaf kelly's rockin.
i kind of secretly want that.

ok.

in between those two soundtracks of my life a lot of good stuff happened.

stuff like....

the. thickest. cake/cookie. i. have. ever. eaten.

my family was down for valentines day.

i had other plans so couldn't meet up with them.

but my dad left me this wonder on my doorstep.

it was red velvet.

because he remembers how much i love that because caroline and i went on and on about how much we love that on our vacation to florida last summer.

he's a good dad.

hi dad.

campus reunions.

i was called a diamond in the rough.

DAY. MADE.

you know who you are.

thank you.

coldstone creamery.

imma...just going to stick to the ice cream from here on out.

funnel cake? not overly impressed.

shopping with el padre and hermana.

completely entertaining.

completely. 

a new ski jacket resembling a certain biblical article of clothing.

and it was red and yellow and green and blue...

i love it.

games. games. games.

forbidden island

zeus on the loose

pit

crazy eights

valentine matching game created by my dad

word on the street

rummikub

bananagrams

it's a new way to play

sometimes the games can get heated but in the end we're all family and get along just as well as you would expect a semi-normal happy family to.

birthday celebration!

rebecca is a quarter of a century old.

and she got some NICE dishes to help satisfy her "dish itch"

mmmm! for gluten free cake.

actually it's pretty good.

this is the "birthday picture."

youre welcome.

missionary farewell.

man.

catherine.

really?

yes.

lord of the rings on tv.

yes it went until the wee hours of the morning.

yes i stayed up to watch it all.

yes my behavior will ALWAYS be such.

and aren't i glad i stayed up because around 1:14am on monday i received...

an email.

one that i really probably shouldn't have gotten

and had a total of 14 words in it

and might be one of the best emails i've ever received

as i expressed in my prompt three word response.

millcreek canyon.

always a pleaser

we so ninja.

minus caroline.

wreck it ralph.

ok. 

this commentary isn't going in small type because i loved that movie so much.

it was hilarious.

and clever.

and cute.

and original.

and clean.

and everything good about a movie that you can think of.

as we were walking out of the theater a little 5 year old girl said to her dad,

"i have never seen something as good as that. this is the best day."

i hear ya child.

i hear ya.

really. 

go see it.

i'll come with you.

plus it's at the dollar......

peace and paninis.
had those over the weekend too.

rrw

Sweet Caroline...

Dun Dun Dahhh....

I know, I know, you get that all the time. But hey, might as well carry on the tradition. Happy Birthday little sister! Here we go, 15 things I love about you, coming right up... But first, let's listen to it just once.

1. You used to have 12 tie-dye shirts and would wear them and only them
2. You could created  LEGO creations (which were supposed to take days) in hours
3. You are super talented and dedicated to what you do (saxophone, clarinet, piano, cross-country)
4. You catch fish from our pond and dissect them
5. You are very beautiful, even if you did go through awkward phase
6. You had an awkward phase and I loved it
7. You forgive me quickly when I'm not the best older sister
8. You came into my room and stayed forever (sometimes I hated it, sometimes I only pretended to hate it)
9. You read your scriptures and write in your journal every night
10. You respond to my crazy facebook chat messages
11. You have awesome dance moves
12. You don't like me playing with your hair, but let me do it sometimes anyway
13. You keep your room clean
14. You tell me when my outfit looks weird
15. You are my sister.

Happy Birthday CJ! I love and miss you.