why

A little less than a month ago I was in the store to buy coconut cookies, vegetable oil and lemons for my host family. They had given me money and a good pat on the back with the encouragement, "You can do it!" and sent me on my way. Now, if you know me, you already know where this is going.

I was stressed out of my mind. Not only was I in the grocery store (my least favorite place on the planet) but I was in a Ukrainian grocery store and had no idea what was going on anywhere. I'll save you the sob story of picking which bread to buy and get to the point though.

There was a problem of some sort when I went to checkout and my lemons were confiscated, which was distressing to me because I really needed them. But guess what? Saying "No, I really need those lemons. I want to buy them. Those are my lemons." Over and over and over in English does you little good in this type of situation.

Finally the woman behind me, taking pity on the flailing American girl, explained what was wrong in her broken English. It was an easy to solve problem and I thanked her for her help, smiling at her little kids who were staring at me like I was some sort of foreign alien. oh wait. As I was about to leave, however, the woman stopped me and asked, "Why are you here? Why are you here, alone, so far from home?" All the Ukrainians in my line and the line over kind of stopped to lean in and listen.

What was I supposed to say? I had three seconds to answer her with simple English while I struggled to stuff all my items in my backpack.

I'm here to learn and change. I'm here to struggle and grow. I'm here to be happy. I'm here to realize how fortunate my life has been and how much I love my family. I'm here to feel incredible love for people I never even knew existed. I'm here to eat borscht and syrniki and liver and fish and chocolate. I'm here to learn how to get along with people. I'm here to gain confidence in myself and my decisions. I'm here to wear the same clothes over and over and over and realize that that's ok. I'm here to travel and see how much bigger the world is than just Utah. I'm here to make memories and friends. I'm here to fall in love with 19 children and hold them on my lap and sing Jingle Bells a dozen times a day. I'm here to rely on Christ and witness tender mercy after tender mercy happen everyday. I'm here to realize how much I love this world.

But as this went zooming through my head I realized I only had two seconds left, so I responded, "I'm here to teach English."

I was here to teach English.

Dasvidanya Ukraine.
rrw